The Real Reason People Don't Buy (Even When They Should)
People buy when they run out of reasons to say no—not when they decide to say yes. The goal isn't to convince someone to buy; it's to help qualified prospects work through what's actually stopping them.
Who You're Really Selling To
You're not selling to everyone. You're selling to the people who:
- Are already qualified and targeted
- Know they should say yes
- Are desperate to make a change
- Understand it's the best thing for them
- And yet still hesitate
The vast majority will say no regardless. Your job is to reach the small percentage who should say yes but aren't because they need to hear certain things first.
Why Qualified Prospects Still Hesitate
Every objection is ultimately rooted in fear of loss tied to self-identity:
- Fear of trying and failing (
I'll feel like a failure
) - Fear of embarrassment in front of loved ones
- Fear of admitting they made a bad decision
These aren't facts. They're thoughts that feel like facts. Your role is to help prospects unpack and move past them.
How to Ethically Help Them Say Yes
1. Stay With Them Longer Than Anyone Else Will
The number one way to increase sales is simply to not give up on people. When you stay on the call, answer questions, and keep showing up, you demonstrate sincerity. Most people have been abandoned before. When you don't abandon them, you win their trust.
2. Agree With Their Objection, Then Redirect
If someone says I don't think I can do it,
don't argue. Agree:
You're right. You can't do it. So knowing that, what's the first step you could take to fail in a way that makes you better tomorrow than you are today?
This removes resistance and creates movement.
3. Chunk It Down
Turn binary objections into percentages:
How much belief that you can do it would you need to move forward—70%? 50%? What would you need to know to feel confident enough to say yes today?
This shifts them from I can't
to under what conditions could I?
4. Earn the Right to Know What's Really Stopping Them
Most people won't tell you their real objection until you've proven you care. Stay with them long enough, and they'll eventually share what's actually holding them back. It's often something deeply personal that has nothing to do with your offer.
5. Transform Them Before You Sell
Whatever you're selling, put transformation in front of it. Transform someone into your best customer before you ever ask for money. Educate, serve, and shift their mindset first.
Important Statements
People buy when they run out of reasons to say no, not when they decide to say yes.
Most of the selling occurs after somebody says no.
Technique is not required when service is in the heart.
The state in which you hear the message is more important than the message itself.
Don't tell your customers how to spend their money.
If you can help the person that nobody else can help, you will win a larger book of business than you could ever think possible.
The best hooks show, they don't tell.
You should always make saying no more expensive than saying yes.
Most people will not tell you what's really holding them back until you've earned the right to know that information.
The Ethical Caveat
This approach only applies to people who are genuinely qualified. This is people for whom not buying is more expensive than buying. The goal is never manipulation. It's helping people who should say yes finally get out of their own way.